They dominate the conversation without listening when it’s your turn to speak. They rarely show concern for your needs and have no problem canceling on you if something better comes up. Sound familiar? If so, you might be dealing with a self-centered person. Here are the signs to look out for to help you recognize if you’re in a one-sided relationship.
Dominates Conversations
A self-centered person often dominates conversations, frequently interrupting others to steer the focus back to themselves. They show little regard for what anyone else has to say unless it pertains to them or their interests. This behavior stifles genuine dialogue and demonstrates a lack of empathy and respect.
Rarely Asks About You
Notice if someone rarely or never asks about your life, feelings, or opinions. This lack of curiosity about others is a hallmark of self-centeredness, as they are primarily focused on their own experiences. When they do ask, it often serves as a segue back to their own stories.
Poor Listening Skills
When in conversation, a self-centered person may appear to listen but frequently check their phone, look around, or seem distracted. They fail to engage meaningfully with what others are saying. Their responses usually redirect the conversation to themselves or their interests.
Constantly Seeks Attention
A self-centered individual craves attention and validation from others to bolster their ego. They may use dramatic or exaggerated expressions of personal issues to capture and hold others’ attention. This behavior can be draining and frustrating for those around them.
Unwilling to Share
Self-centered people prioritize their own needs and comfort above others, often at the expense of those around them. This trait can manifest in both personal relationships and professional environments.
Lack of Empathy
There is often a noticeable lack of empathy as self-centered individuals struggle to put themselves in someone else’s shoes. They rarely show genuine concern for others’ problems unless those issues affect them directly. This can make them seem cold or uncaring.
Often Feels Entitled
They believe they deserve special treatment and consideration that others do not. This entitlement can lead to unreasonable demands on others’ time, patience, and resources. They react negatively when they don’t receive the special treatment they expect.
Breaks Promises
Keeping commitments is not a priority for someone who is self-centered unless it directly benefits them. They often cancel plans last minute or fail to follow through on promises when something better comes along. Their unreliability can be a significant strain on their relationships.
Manipulative Behavior
Self-centered individuals may resort to manipulation to maintain control or ensure that outcomes align with their desires. They might use guilt, flattery, or deceit as tools to influence the actions of others. Recognizing these tactics is crucial for maintaining personal boundaries.
Reacts Poorly to Criticism
Handling criticism is a difficult task for self-centered people; they often react defensively or even aggressively. Instead of using feedback as an opportunity for growth, they view it as a personal attack. This defensiveness can hinder personal and professional development.
Takes More Than Gives
In any exchange or relationship, a self-centered person tends to take more than they give. They view interactions as transactions where they must end up with the most benefit. Friends and partners may feel undervalued or exploited as a result.
Frequently Envies Others
Envy is common among self-centered individuals, who often compare themselves to others in terms of success, possessions, or relationships. They struggle to feel happy for others’ achievements, instead feeling bitter or overshadowed. This can lead to a toxic environment, especially in close relationships.
Rarely Apologizes
True apologies from a self-centered person are rare, as admitting fault does not align with their self-image. When they do apologize, it often comes with justifications or is followed by the word “but,” which undermines the sincerity of the statement. Genuine remorse is seldom seen.
Uses People for Personal Gain
They often view relationships primarily as a means to an end, valuing what others can do for them rather than the relationship itself. This utilitarian approach can be hurtful and damaging, as it reduces meaningful interactions to mere transactions.
Overly Competitive
A self-centered person tends to be excessively competitive, not just in games or sports but in everyday situations where competition is unnecessary. They strive to outdo others, even in trivial matters, to maintain a sense of superiority. This need to always “win” can strain relationships.
Disregards Others’ Feelings
Ignoring the feelings and needs of others is a clear sign of self-centeredness. They often make decisions that impact others without consulting them or considering the consequences for them. This disregard can lead to resentment and conflict within relationships.
Obsessed with Personal Appearance
While there’s nothing wrong with taking pride in one’s appearance, a self-centered person may be obsessed with how they look to the point of narcissism. They invest an inordinate amount of time and resources into maintaining an image that often serves to gain admiration and attention.
Rejects Compromise
Self-centered individuals struggle with compromise as it involves giving up something they want for the benefit of someone else. In negotiations or conflicts, they push for outcomes that serve their interests, often at the expense of others’ needs or desires.
Expects Praise and Compliments
They often expect and fish for compliments to reinforce their self-esteem and will become visibly disappointed or irritated if they don’t receive the praise they believe they deserve. This need for constant validation can be exhausting for those around them.
Ignores Advice
Typically, self-centered people are poor at taking advice from others, preferring to follow their own counsel even when it’s to their detriment. This can lead to repeated mistakes or missed opportunities, as they are unwilling to consider other perspectives or learn from others.
Talks Over Others
In group conversations, self-centered individuals might constantly talk over others, not allowing them to express their thoughts fully. This behavior not only disrupts communication but also shows a lack of respect for the opinions of others.
Showcases Achievements Unnecessarily
They frequently find ways to weave their achievements or assets into conversations, even when it’s not relevant. This behavior is a tactic to steer attention back to themselves and highlight their success, reinforcing their need for admiration.
Lacks Long-term Friendships
Maintaining long-term relationships can be challenging for self-centered people, as their behavior eventually wears on friends and partners. The lack of deep, enduring friendships is often a result of their inability to foster equality and reciprocity in relationships.
Unwilling to Share the Spotlight
A self-centered individual struggles to share recognition or the spotlight with others, even in team or group achievements. They often seek to take credit for collective efforts, minimizing the contributions of others.
Avoids Genuine Commitment
Commitment requires considering and prioritizing another’s needs and desires, a challenge for someone who is self-centered. They may avoid making commitments or shy away from obligations that require them to put others first.
