21 Ways To Tell a Friend Isn’t Genuine

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Identifying a fake friend can be challenging, but it’s crucial for maintaining healthy relationships. These individuals often display subtle but telling behaviors that reveal their true nature.

By recognizing these signs, you can protect yourself from emotional manipulation and disappointment. This article outlines the most clear indicators of a fake friend, helping you spot them from a mile away.

They Are Only Around When They Need Something

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A fake friend often appears only when they need a favor. You’ll notice their sudden interest in your life coincides with their own needs. Genuine friends, on the other hand, maintain a consistent presence regardless of circumstances.

They Disappear During Your Tough Times

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When you face challenges, fake friends are nowhere to be found. True friends stand by you through thick and thin, offering support and understanding. This absence during hardship is a clear indicator of their insincerity.

They Gossip About You

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image credit: Bojan Milinkov/Shutterstock

Fake friends frequently talk behind your back. They may spread rumors or share your secrets, betraying your trust. A real friend respects your privacy and defends you in your absence.

They Are Jealous of Your Success

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Instead of celebrating your achievements, fake friends display envy and resentment. They might downplay your successes or make you feel guilty for them. True friends rejoice in your accomplishments and encourage your growth.

They Compete with You

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A fake friend views your relationship as a competition. They constantly compare themselves to you and try to one-up you in every aspect. Genuine friendships thrive on mutual support and collaboration, not rivalry.

They Take Advantage of You

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These friends are quick to exploit your kindness and generosity. They often ask for favors without reciprocating. True friends appreciate your help and seek to maintain a balanced, reciprocal relationship.

They Are Manipulative

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Fake friends use manipulation to get what they want. They might play on your emotions or guilt-trip you into doing things for them. Genuine friends respect your boundaries and communicate honestly.

They Don’t Keep Their Promises

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Constantly breaking promises is a hallmark of a fake friend. They make commitments they have no intention of honoring. True friends value their word and strive to be reliable and trustworthy.

They Make You Feel Drained

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Spending time with a fake friend often leaves you feeling exhausted and unappreciated. These relationships are emotionally taxing and lack genuine connection. In contrast, real friendships are energizing and fulfilling.

They Never Apologize

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Fake friends refuse to acknowledge their mistakes. They rarely, if ever, apologize for their wrongdoings, leaving issues unresolved. True friends take responsibility for their actions and seek to make amends.

They Are Self-Centered

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These friends prioritize their own needs and interests above yours. Conversations often revolve around them, with little regard for your feelings or experiences. Real friends show genuine interest in your life and listen attentively.

They Are Inconsistent

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Inconsistency is a key trait of fake friends. Their behavior and attitudes towards you change frequently, leaving you uncertain of where you stand. True friends are consistent and reliable in their actions and emotions.

They Are Critical and Judgmental

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Fake friends often criticize and judge you harshly. They may make you feel inadequate or inferior. True friends offer constructive feedback and support you with kindness and empathy.

They Exclude You

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If you notice you’re often left out of social gatherings, it’s a red flag. Fake friends will exclude you from plans and make you feel unwelcome. True friends include you and ensure you feel part of the group.

They Lack Empathy

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These friends show little to no empathy for your struggles or emotions. They are indifferent to your feelings and fail to offer support. True friends are empathetic and compassionate, providing comfort when needed.

They Are Dishonest

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Dishonesty is a common trait of fake friends. They lie to you and deceive you, eroding your trust. Genuine friendships are built on honesty and transparency.

They Use You for Social Climbing

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Fake friends often maintain relationships for personal gain. They may use your connections or status to advance their own social standing. True friends value you for who you are, not what you can offer.

They Avoid Deep Conversations

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Surface-level conversations are the norm with fake friends. They avoid discussing meaningful topics or delving into personal matters. True friends engage in deep, meaningful conversations and are interested in understanding you on a deeper level.

They Show No Interest in Your Life

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A fake friend will display minimal interest in your life events and experiences. They rarely ask about your day or follow up on significant news. True friends are genuinely interested in your well-being and stay informed about your life.

They Disrespect Your Boundaries

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Ignoring your boundaries is a clear sign of a fake friend. They might push you into uncomfortable situations or disregard your limits. Real friends respect your boundaries and consider your comfort and preferences.

They Are Quick to Blame

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Fake friends are often quick to blame you when things go wrong. They deflect responsibility and make you feel at fault for their issues. True friends accept responsibility and work together to resolve conflicts.

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